new hope

I have tried to start this post 1,000 times already and since I'm getting tired of rewriting sentences, I'm just going to get on with it. The past few days have been hectic, and I'm excited to be in my bed now, with my mosquito net tucked under my mattress, preparing for sleep. Many of you have asked me over the past week how the boys are doing. I'll do my best to re-cap the past few days, while giving you an update on each of our boys.

I'll admit to you all that Tuesday and Wednesday were pretty boring days in the eyes of most. I spent most of the days doing Internet research for grants while working on some administrative paperwork, while Andrew took the boys to a local health clinic to get the immunizations required by Ugandan schools.

Wednesday evening I did get a chance to go to Come, Let's Dance (CLD), an organization that I was originally supposed to work with this summer, but declined to help The Street Child Project progress further. It was so wonderful to get to see the children at the CLD Kid's House that I worked with last summer, especially two abandoned babies that I became very attached to-Jordan and Jackson. The babies are now growing toddlers and adorable as ever--they're learning much more English and even sang "Pharaoh, Pharaoh" for me! I couldn't believe how these two babies, abandoned at a trash-dump just last summer, have become so well-established at their new home. Last summer the babies were so emotionally wounded from their abandonment, they rarely showed any positive emotions. This summer, however, they are all smiles and giggles. I couldn't take my eyes off of them-they are simply beautiful little kids. There is word that one of the teacher volunteers might adopt one or both of them, which brings up a lot of emotions inside of me. Still, knowing that Jordan and Jackson could find a permanent home is something that makes me very happy, even if I wouldn't get a chance to see them on my future trips to Uganda.

Thursday was an incredible day spent with our boys at the camp. Tracy and I traveled down to Entebbe to hang out with the kids and ended up, instead, in a long conversation with Andrew about the boys education. We're constantly faced with the dilemma about the best opportunity for them. All of the boys have missed out on many years of their education, and are subsequently far behind other children their age who have been regularly attending school. If we were to put them straight into school that would mean putting 11 and 12 year olds in the equivalent of Kindergarten or 1st grade, with 5 and 6 year olds. Concerned about the emotional trauma such a situation could cause, we've been frantically trying to come up with an alternative situation.

Thursday, we all came to a conclusion. We would look for a certified teacher to tutor the boys up to their appropriate school level until the new school year starts in January/February. We were trying to decide where to find a proper teacher, when Andrew remembered that one of our most loyal volunteers, Eric, was a trained teacher! We brought him into the discussion and ended some time later with Eric's decision to come on staff with us for the next six months as our teacher. Praise God that we were able to find someone who knows and loves the kids and is qualified to fill our needs!!

The most exciting part of the afternoon was formally bringing the kids into the discussion. Tracy is always advocating that the children be included in all major decisions and that they have an opportunity to voice their opinions and ask questions throughout the process. Providng them this chance has been such an incredible form of child empowerment and has been a learning platform for all the staff.

As we explained to the boys our idea of "home-schooling" in the garage of the new house, they seemed a bit nervous at first. We explained that the 10 boys would be assessed by the teacher and divided up into groups according to their educational levels. These groups, or "learning pods," would meet with the teacher twice a day, before lunch and after lunch, four days a week. They all expressed concern about being assessed and grouped with students that were either above or below their own educational levels. Most of all, they were concerned about the teacher and what kind of punishment they might use in the classroom. (Ugandan schools are known for caning their students.) The kwagala moment of the day came when we explained that "Uncle Eric" would be their new teacher and the boys all started cheering and clapping with joy. When they imagined a strange, perhaps unfriendly instructor teaching them, they were all visibly nervous. But from the moment they heard that Eric, a trustworthy man that truly cares for the kids, was filling that role, their faces changed from anxious to joyful and the room filled with laughter and excitement. In just a few moments, it was as though their hope was renewed, their spirits uplifted and their desire to learn ignited once again.

Shortly after we announced that Eric would be teaching, the boys started giving some suggestions for how they wanted to see our school run. Robert suggested they start school at 8am, after they completed chores. Kabugo said he wanted to bathe every day before school. Kimbowa said he wanted to be fed big meals at lunchtime. (Just to clarify, I have eaten lunch with these boys many, many times and can attest to the fact that their meals are sizeable and we keep them well-fed.) They all wanted a blackboard in their classroom and voted for "color changes" as a form of punishment, as opposed to caning. After hearing their input and taking notes on their suggestion, we let them go outside to play cricket-their new favorite game. It has been decided that the boys will start tutoring this August and go until the new year, when they will all take entrance exams and enroll in a local school. Tomorrow we're off to buy school supplies and the first round of furniture for move-in day on Monday!

with love,
Amanda

changes come

Dearest friends,

My sincerest apologies for taking so many weeks to give a thorough account of my life in Uganda these days. There is now so much to account for I don't know where to begin!

I wish I could write back from the beginning-starting with the art/sports camp led by the American volunteers, but for time's sake I won't go into as much detail as I would love to. Instead I'll start with dropping the Charlotte team at the airport. Leaving Eva, Rachel and Laura was so difficult--they brought me so much joy and encouragement every day that I truly wanted to make them miss their flight and keep them in Uganda with me. (Rachel probably would have been okay with that!) I told them later it was like leaving a part of my heart behind when I left them at the airport! But more than that, the boys miss them terribly. Both the volunteers and the kids adopted each other into their families. Peter even cried today because he missed Laura so much...

After the Charlotte team left, Tatiana and I moved in with her host family from last summer-the Mutungi family. The family was so sweet to me and treated me just like one of their own kids. Both parents turned out to be great resources for me to talk to--the mom has worked with children's orgs across Kampala and the dad, an art professor at Makerere, has led community art projects sponsored by the Ford Foundation, the United Nations and USAID.

After spending some time with their family and interviewing Professor Mutungi, Tati and I met with the director of a children's village in Wakiso district. We spent Monday with him and visiting his children's home and primary school. He's been the best person, next to Victoria, so far that I've talked to about starting an organization. He listed every step for registering a children's home/school and gave advice I haven't heard anywhere else so far.

On Tuesday and Wednesday Tatiana and I did our best to turn the camp into a school. The boys were begging us for English and math lessons, so I took one subject (English) and Tati took the other. We were also able to use some country profiles that my dear friend Jenny Morgan made that allowed us to introduce geography: different continents and oceans, countries and capitals and how to read a map. We tried to organize the boys and cater to their different levels, and ended up teaching for non-stop during the days. Their desire for education is something I rarely see in students in the West--it was so refreshing. The experience really motivated me to start looking for schools in which to enroll them.

On Thursday Tracy and Pastor Phillip surprised all of us coming to the camp and bringing an American art teacher from Come Let's Dance to do a painting project with the boys. They also brought a lot of children books for the boys to read, which was so helpful. As much as we loved doing English and math with the boys, it was good to have a program for the day instead of trying to come up with an endless supply of vocabulary words! Tracy spent the night on Thursday with them and then led a focus group with them on Friday morning that introduced them to the UN Convention for the Rights of a Child and some basic ideas of child empowerment.

I dropped Tatiana off at the airport early Friday morning. She had been such a help and encouragment to me, I was really sad to see her go as well! But as soon as I dropped her off, I jumped into work and spent the weekend with Andrew, first securing a new house for the boys to move into and then visiting various primary schools in the area (Kitala) for the boys to attend. The house is on the other side of Entebbe Road, but walking distance from Banana village. It's very spacious with 4 bedrooms and well within out price range. If everything goes according to plan (which it rarely does) we hope to move into the new house next Monday. The only tricky matter at the moment is finding furniture for the house and moving it to the house this week.

I was back at the camp today with the boys, leading more English lessons, playing some ultimate Frisbee and recording for the documentary I hope someone will make for the website. When we arrived all the boys were painting outside, which was a wonderful sight to see. Kimbowa was doing two splatter paintings which he explained as representing his life on the street and then his life after coming to our project. In the first painting, he shared that the black and red represented the death and blood he witnessed on the streets, the green represented street children's love for money and the little specks of yellow were for the love and his best friend, Kalisti, shared for one another. The painting is messy, dark and depressing.

The second painting is orderly, though created with the splattering of paint. It is three colors-white, which represents the love that came from the people he met at our project, orange, which represents his happiness, and teal, which represents the love of his freedom to practice his passions like art. It was so encouraging to see such a young boy passionate about art and able to share his testimony through his work. Then again, that's what the Street Child Project is all about-seeing lives transformed and turning passions into professions.

Thanks so much for taking time to read this message-I know it's long and I'll try to limit the next ones! Hope all is well at home. Please continue to pray for our boys--that we will continue to see changes come and transform their lives and that each of their passions may be developed. )(Don't forget to let me know if I can pray for you as well!)

love,
Amanda

camp

Wow. There is so much to say and not nearly enough time to write a proper post. I will do my best to update you in the few minutes I have left.

My volunteers-Tatiana, Tracy, Laura, Rachel and Eva-arrived last weekend. With only a day of R&R, we jumped into camp with the boys in our program on Monday morning. Each day we spend time teaching photography, music, basic art lessons and frisbee and loving on the boys as much as we can. It is so good to see them well fed, well rested and happy. They are opening up to us more every day and I can see how much our program is benefitting them. What a blessing it is to see them grow.

More than that, it is a privilege to watch the ways in which the American volunteers love on the kids with hugs, tender words and prayers of blessing. The biggest argument between the volunteers so far has been: how can we best demonstrate our love to the boys.

I wish I had time for more but will try to write a longer post next week!

with love,
Amanda

internet may come and go, but God stays the same.

I'm sure some of you may be wondering lately what I've spent the past week and a half doing, besides keeping my eyes and ears open for "love stories." I'm glad you asked.

Since my arrival in Uganda I haven't had much time to sit still, as we work with The Street Child Project. My objectives in the past week have been multi-layered and I have been blessed enough to have John and Cindy, the couple with which I'm staying, walking by my side the entire way.

The primary goal I have had was to register our organization as a nonprofit corporation/NGO in Uganda. With God's help, every day we come a little closer to achieving that goal. The lawyer has been very prompt and the turn-around for paper work seems much shorter than we had originally imagined. The registration forms have been written, proofread and edited again--they will be sent off the lawyers office on Monday morning. We have spent hours meeting, debating, reading and re-reading every word of the document to make sure it is exactly what we want.

Another project that has consumed a good deal of my time has included the beginning stages of the building project. Yusef and Francis, members of our partner organization FOCUS:Uganda, have graciously volunteered their time to work with us in various ways. Yusef has decided to teach our boys skills in plant propogation while developing the landscape of our center, and in addition has graciously created the necessary graphic drawings to assist Francis, the engineer. Today we were able to meet with both Yusef and Francis, as well as the acting General Secretary of FOCUS: Uganda to discuss our building plans further. We will meet on the land in Nkumba Monday evening to take initial measurements--at that point the engineer will give us estimates for the building of the entire rehabiltiation center/school.

Andrew, John, Cindy and myself have also interviewed and evaluated three organizations (thus far) that work with at-risk children in Uganda. They have all been so gracious in meeting with us and answering our questions; it seems to me they are just happy to have other individuals willing to delve into this kind of work.

Finally, and to my joy, I have spent time in the past week preparing for the American team of volunteers that arrive tomorrow. (Actually, Tatiana landed today and is here in Kololo with me now!) I am so looking forward to picking them up tomorrow and beginning the art/sports camp with our boys on Monday morning.

Besides going to church, reading and finishing lots of necessary paperwork, my days have been spent doing what I've mentioned above. I hope that gives you a little insight into what the first leg of my trip has entailed. Tomorrow I leave the Norton's home, which I will dearly miss, and head for Banana Village. Unfortunately, there is no internet at Banana Village and it will most likely be at least a week before I can write another post. Sad, I know, but just remember: internet may come and go, but God says the same. Monday we begin our second art camp--please pray that things go well! I will update y'all as soon as possible.

with love,
Amanda

radical love

My goal in writing this blog was to look for true, selfless, Christ-inspired love while in Uganda. Here's a pretty powerful love story for you:

Today I was able to go to the FOCUS: Uganda headquarters with the Nortons again for some additional meetings regarding The Street Child Project. At 8am every morning, the FOCUS staff begins their work with a communal Bible study. The new American intern from Wheaton College led the devotion and chose the topic of how suffering is related to the Christian life. He began our conversation with the following question:

Is suffering a necessary part of the Christian faith, why or why not?

I kept quiet while I listened to the group discuss why they believe suffering is integral to the Christian faith and the danger of living a sheltered, safe, privileged life. It was incredible to hear the leaders of FOCUS discussing the topic, admitting their struggles and spouting Bible verses from what felt like nearly every book of the New Testament from memory. I was continuously flipping the pages of my Bible trying to keep up. Their combined passion, energy and intellect was so refreshing to witness.

Sam, the current General Secretary of FOCUS:Uganda, a wise man and a dear friend, mentioned that he believed enduring suffering was a component of the Christian faith, primarily because God calls us to act selflessly, surrender everything and love radically. He continued with a story to illustrate.

A few nights ago Sam was in his house working on the computer when he heard a child crying somewhere outside. The crying continued and finally progressed to screaming, at which point Sam went to look outside his window. There he saw his neighbor, a grown man, pushing a small child up against the fence with all his might. Sam, unsure of what to do, sat back down at his desk and tried to reason through the situation. Confronting the man could endanger Sam's own life or the life of his wife and young son. Before long he heard the neighbor shout to the boy to get a rope. Confused, Sam got up and looked out the window again. The man had stripped the boy naked, tied his hands and feet, pushed him to the ground and was beating him with a cable. Though Sam did not have the physical strength to go and force the man to leave the boy alone, he walked out of his house and confronted the man.

Sam mentioned to as that as he approached the man, he was entirely unsure of himself--what to do or what to say. From his actions, I believe he would say that the only thing of which he was sure was that there was evil in front of him that desperately needed to be thwarted with the kind of selfless love that flows only from God. He approached the man.

"Good day sir," Sam said.

"Good day," the neighbor replied.

Sam looked at the boy, and again at the man. "Sir, are you willing to kill your own child?"

The neighbor attempted to protest. "This is my son," the man replied, implying Sam had no business in the matter.

Sam remained silent and stared at the man. He didn't use any physical force. He didn't even raise his voice. The man put down his whip. Finally, his wife came outside and the horrific scene between the father and son ended.

The interaction reminds me so much of the account in the book of John chapter 8, where a group of Jewish leaders drag a woman guilty of adultery in front of Jesus to be stoned for her crime. The Pharisees are happy to put Jesus in such a dilemma, as they are convinced that either they will force Jesus to allow the killing of the woman or they will witness him disregarding the established law of Moses. Both of these, killing the woman and disregarding the law, would could have ended Jesus' life immediately--either his crowds would have been displeased with him or he would have been accused of heresy. However Jesus is devoted to both the law and to justice and so surprises all of the men by saying:

Let he who is sinless, cast the first stone.

Jesus doesn't disregard the law, for he permits the stones to be thrown, however he redefines the standard for throwing the stones in such a way that no one can kill the woman. Her life is spared and the love of Christ demonstrated to her.

He doesn't yell at the Jewish leaders. He doesn't attack them violently. Instead, he looks them in the eye with love and honesty, regardless of whether or not their actions called for such humanity.

He seems to ask them, do you really want to kill this woman?

Sam strives to model Christ, but as he mentioned this morning during our discussion on suffering, following Christ is a daily struggle. It takes immense courage at times and massive faith in God. It does not come naturally. We are inclined to act in our own interests, but following Christ takes us out of ourselves and calls us to the only thing that will ever save the world: radical love.

because of who He is

I'm listening to a song now by Judy Jacobs titled, "Because of Who You Are." It's been a favorite song of mine for a long time, and tonight it holds significance because of a conversation I had this evening.

John and Cindy Norton (my host family) arranged an interview for me and Andrew with their friend who directs Hope Alive, a Christian organization that works with at-risk children in Uganda. Catherine, the director, is a calm, patient and well-spoken woman who has spent nearly twenty years working in Africa under World Venture. The Nortons invited her over to dinner so John, Cindy, Andrew and I could interview her and get to know her and her work more fully. She gave us incredible insight into starting and running a non-profit corporation and was able to give advice on both logistical, management as well as emotional and spiritual issues.

One things she advised us to do was evaluate our motivations--something that I've done time and time again. She made us aware that, worldwide, there is a 50% success rate for projects started for at-risk children and that the average project lasts around 3 years. Not encouraging statistics for eager social activists. The problem she attributed this to was the misguided motivation of founders, directors, staff and volunteers--namely, compassion.

As she explained, the more an individuals' social activism efforts are motivated by their compassion, the more likely their project is to fail. Destroyed emotionally by their own helplessness in the face of immense suffering, workers are quick to burn out.

I spent the first half of my morning listening to workers from another local child project governed by FOCUS: Uganda. The workers mentioned a mother with AIDS who is very close to death and her three children. The oldest daughter is in the equivalent of third grade and is terrified of her mother's imminent death. She is inable to watch her mother sleep for fear that she has died in her sleep, so she constantly wakes up her mother, day or night. The mother, who cares immensely for her children, promises the children she will stay awake during the night so her children can sleep peacefully. If she happens to fall asleep, the children fall into hysterics, wake her up and the cycle continues. There is no peace in their household and the tragedy is nearly breaking the hearts and spirit of the staff workers reaching out to the exhausted, impoverished family. I found myself wondering today not only how these families are surviving, but how these staff workers are able to surround themselves with suffering so often.

As I met Catherine this evening, I realized that I am becoming more sensitive to those working in the social justice field. By that, I mean that it is becoming easier and easier to identify someone who has worked among the poor and suffering for a long period of time. There is something in their voice, their spirit, that allows me to detect that they are a veteran of the field. There is a tiredness, a sadness, a brokenness about them that is very distinct. It's as though they've given up. And yet, they continue to work. I wonder to myself--from where do they draw their motivation? Their hope?

I am by no means a veteran, and yet there are days when I'm tired of hearing stories of human suffering. There are days, even here, when my helplessness and discouragement feels close to despair and I'm ready to turn my back, forget about the sick and the hungry and the poor and give up because their hopelessness feels too overwhelming. There are days when I wonder if there is any hope for this lost world.

Catherine was an encouragement tonight, in that she is one of these veteran social workers who continues fighting for justice in the darkest areas of this country. She stressed the importance that we, as Christians working with at-risk children, ground ourselves spiritually and draw our motivations from the nature of God. She reminded us that if we are motivated by compassion, which at times I am, our strength will fail and our streams will run dry. But if we tell each other constantly that we work because of God's redeeming nature we will derive our strength from an eternal source. In God, there is hope that creation will be restored and renewed. That the evil that has taken over this world will soon be defeated by God's victory. That the suffering we see so clearly here and work so hard to end will soon be turned into fathomless joy. In God, hope is like a stream in the desert of a dry, parched, thirsty world.

Still, I wondered why it is that those workers like Catherine seem so burdened by suffering. Why does it seem like these veterans of social justice work have given up? After thinking about it for a while, I think it's because they have given something up--by that I mean they've given themselves up. They've surrendered their entire lives to a God who demands, but offered, radical sacrifice. And all because of who He is.

family

The good news of the day is that Brian's fever broke and his pain is mostly gone--praise God. He is so good. Thank you to EVERYONE for the prayers--they were greatly needed. Please continue to pray for his continued recovery and I'll keep you all posted on his progress.

There's no much information to report this evening. Today was a day for administrative work over here in Uganda. I didn't get a chance to see the boys, which always is a bit upsetting, but Andrew and I were able to go to a prominent newspaper, New Vision, to meet with the Deputy Editor. She has assigned one of her writers, a "features" journalist and art critic, to come to the grounds where our art workshop will take place to do a write-up for the paper. After we met with her Andrew and I were able to take several hours to sit in a local cafe and discuss the details and vision for The Street Child Project. We were also able to talk in depth about each child and begin records for each of them which include important background information like family, health and school history. We were also able to make a list of the contact information for some of the kids living relatives. We had such a lovely afternoon talking about our kids--we just adore every single one of them and thank God he has decided to use us to reach out to this group.

I can't end this post without saying that the boys really are transforming, step by step. Since Andrew has gained their trust, their fighting is truly non-existent now and they resolve their conflicts verbally and maturely. They volunteer to lead Bible study and feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and prayers with one another. Perhaps most importantly, they continue to express that, in this community God has decided to knit together, they believe they have finally found family.